Notes from a child

Got this from Daphne's blog and I just want to repost it as I feel that all parents and parents to be should know these things.. :)

1. Don't spoil me. I know quite well that I ought not to have all I ask for. I'm only testing you.

2. Don't be afraid to be firm with me. I prefer it, it makes me feel secure.

3. Don't let me form bad habits. I have to rely on you to detect them in the early stages.

4. Don't make me feel smaller than I am. It only makes me behave stupidly "big".

5. Don't correct me in front of people if you can help it. I'll take much more notice if you talk quietly with me in private.

6. Don't make me feel that my mistakes are sins. It upsets my sense of values.

7. Don't protect me from consequences. I need to learn the painful way sometimes.

8. Don't be too upset when I say "I hate you". Sometimes it isn't you I hate but your power to thwart me.

9. Don't take too much notice of my small ailments. Sometimes they get me the attention I need.

10. Don't nag. If you do, I shall have to protect myself by appearing deaf.

11. Don't forget that I cannot explain myself as well as I should like. That is why I am not always accurate.

12. Don't put me off when I ask questions. If you do, you will find that I stop asking and seek my information elsewhere.

13. Don't be inconsistent. That completely confuses me and makes me lose faith in you.

14. Don't tell me my fears are silly. They are terribly real and you can do much to reassure me if you try to understand.

15. Don't ever suggest that you are perfect or infallible. It gives me too great a shock when I discover that you are neither.

16. Don't ever think that it is beneath your dignity to apologize to me. An honest apology makes me feel surprisingly warm towards you.

17. Don't forget I love experimenting. I couldn't get along without it, so please put up with it.

18. Don't forget how quickly I am growing up. It must be very difficult for you to keep pace with me, but please do try.

19. Don't forget that I don't thrive without lots of love and understanding, but I don't need to tell you, do I?

20. Please keep yourself fit and healthy. I need you.

Mommyhood

My days have been a bit different than when we still have a yaya to help us with some chores and look after my little one while I am working. When Jared wakes up, I have to feed him milk and then after a little while he'll have his breakfast, bathe him, read a book and then let him play then I can have my time for work. Good thing I'm not working in a regular office that I can still work while looking after my son.

I am really enjoying it as I can personally take care of my little one. However, there are times that it gets a bit overwhelming. There are just times that I needed a break. So I really admire all the moms who have a handful of kids and they just seem to take it so easy.

Now I'm guilty of using the TV so that I can have free time. But I'm working on this, trying to lessen his tv time and suggest other activities like playtime together, art projects and reading.

He doesn't have much playmates in the neighborhood so he still doesn't know how to really socialize with kids. So we're planning to send him to school this coming school year. Unfortunately, schools won't accept him for nursery because he'll be only three this June and the required age should be 3.5 yrs. Finally, we decided to just enroll him in a toddler school wherein he can still learn and also gain friends.

Now that we still don't have a yaya and have some issues on getting a new one, I try to cherish and enjoy every moment. It was really fulfilling though sometimes overwhelming.. But it sure was all worth it.

Not sure if I'm still making sense here.. anyway, back to regular programming :)

Nigthmares

Lately, we've been dealing with middle of the night interruptions from Jared. He usually wakes up crying because of his nightmares and asks us to find Spongebob. There was one time that he wanted to go out of our room and asked us to open the door to look for his spongebob toy. He led his father outside the room to look for spongebob but returned immediately when he saw none. But after a while he would go back to sleep. I wonder if he ever fully wakes up from his dreams.

I've been trying to explain to him that it was only a dream and dreams are not real but I think he's too little to understand it. He is so into spongebob maybe that's why he dreams of it often. I think I should divert his attention to other things..

Dentist day

Yesterday was Jared's second visit to his dentist and he had the same reaction as to his first. The dentist checked his teeth very quickly and applied fluoride varnish in all his teeth. She said that there are 4 more teeth to come out at his age now and the next set will pop out on his 6th year.

But before that moment, we spent some time in the playroom while waiting for his turn. That moment was the one he really enjoyed. He played on the little slide, the shape sorter and browsed some books. But he still didn't know the concept of sharing. When another kid came, he would drag all the toys at his side so that he can play with it alone. He would cry if someone touches "his" toys. I hope he learns to share soon..

Gagging in toddlers

Jared has been refusing rice meals since the day he got mouth sores. When he had it, he refused to eat anything maybe because it hurts when he chews food. So I decided to process his food in a blender so he can just swallow it and won't feel the pain. But when he got well and I started feeding him textured foods (rice meals), he still refused. He always wanted it smooth so he can just swallow it. He gags or throws up when he eats something textured but this is only on rice meals. At most times, he spits out when he sensed that the food is not blended/processed. On the other hand, he loves eating crackers and cookies. I wonder if he really dislikes the taste and texture of rice or he just liked the idea of eating soft foods effortlessly.

I envy all the other kids of his age who are eating adult foods so well. I have already consulted this to his pedia and she told us to just start with soft rice and keep reintroducing things and then he will eventually grow out of it. I wish that this 'eventually' becomes 'instantly'.. sigh..

Discipline Without Shouting or Spanking

I bought a book recently which is all about how to discipline pre-school kids. The book has lots of topics and problems usually encountered by parents with preschool kids and gives most practical solutions on how to deal with such problem.

I have read some part of it and for me, it's a good book since I believe in a diplomatic kind of discipline (the one without shouting or spanking). But still I can't deny that there have been times that I shouted at my toddler.. and I want to change it. I just hope that I would always have the needed self control whenever my son will have his tantrums.

Potty Training

We bought Jared a potty trainer when he turned 15 months. We started with training him to poop on his potty. Whenever we see him start doing it, we will immediately lead him to his potty and say "poopoo". We chose that word because it's easier to pronounce. I also informed everyone at home that we will be using only one term for it so he can get to familiarize with it faster.

And now he says "poopoo" whenever he feels like making a bowel movement. After that, we will bring him to his potty and let him do his thing. He will then stand up when he's done. He does not soil his diapers with poop anymore. I'm so happy! Now, we have to train him how to pee and aim at his potty and maybe how to remove his underpants. Good luck to us! :)

Baby Einstein - worth it or not?

Jared has been fond of the Baby Einstein videos lately. His favorite is the Numbers Nursery and he can now identify the numbers from 1 to 5. We let him watch one almost every morning believing that it would really help him expand his vocabulary. But after some research, I thought maybe we're wrong...

I've read from the internet that for every hour a day that babies 8 to 16 months old were shown such popular series as “Brainy Baby” or “Baby Einstein,” they knew six to eight fewer words than other children. Ok, I got worried about this but I don't exactly believe it.

Moreover, there was also a study which showed that educational movies influence negatively on the infants (8-16 months) language skills development and it influence neither positively nor negatively on children from 18 to 24 months.

Well, I knew way before that watching TV is not recommended for children under age 2 but I think it's unrealistic or just impossible to do since everyone at home watches TV. I think that what we should do is just guide and accompany our toddlers whenever they watch TV and also limit their viewing time.

So now I decided not to show these videos to Jared until he turns two. For me, reading and conversation are still the best language learning tools.

Ouch!

Jared got a minor wound on his hand 2 days ago. He was playing outside (running and jumping) and suddenly lost his balance and had his hand scratched. It drew blood. He cried after the incident. Too bad I was not there when it happened. Noemi, his nanny, consoled him by blowing some air into the wound (a way to soothe or lessen the pain but I'm not sure if it's the right thing to do) and then washed it. From then, when we talked about his wound he would always ask us to blow on it even if there's no pain anymore haha!

Love escalators, hate elevators

When we are at the mall, Jared always likes to ride on an escalator. He sees it as one of the kiddie rides. Whenever he sees one, he would always drag us in the escalator and then go up and down and then do it all over again. It's nice to see the smile on his face whenever he's riding on it but it's sometimes annoying to go up and down repeatedly. Good thing, Ryan is patient in this area so he's always the one who goes with Jared.

However, it's the opposite whenever we go into an elevator. He cries and trembles when he goes into one. This has happened 3 times or so, I think. This fear started just a few months ago.

So last week when we went to the mall, we decided to take the stairs instead of the lift. Apparently, the stairs are located in front of the elevator so he will still have a chance to see it. And when he saw the doors of the elevators, he suddenly starts crying and trembling. We hurriedly went through the stairs and tried to console him after.

I am not sure what this is about. I don't know if it's the motion he's afraid of or the enclosed space. I just hope that this is just a phase and that he will eventually outgrow this.

Comfort Habits

Comfort habits are things that older babies and toddlers do in order to comfort or soothe themselves, such as thumb or finger sucking, using a pacifier or carrying a favorite blanket. In Jared’s case, it is thumbsucking.

I have read in some parenting books and magazines that thumbsucking is part of a baby’s life and that we should let it come naturally and not prevent the baby from doing it. And that time will come when this will pass and will no longer be a problem.

He started this habit when he was 2 or 3 months and we just let him then. But now that he’s already 16 months, we are really bothered because he has not yet been able to get rid of this habit. He does it when he’s bored or when he’s not doing anything and when he goes to sleep. His dentist told us to try to control this habit or divert his attention when he starts to suck his thumb. She also told us that it may also develop protruding teeth or pick up an infection while sucking his thumb. I got some tips from a parenting website on how to deal with habitual thumbsuckers, here they are:

1. Dont make your child feel conscious about sucking her thumb.
2. Dont nag your child.
3. Dont worry about it. Your child will pick up on your concern, which will in turn cause her to worry.
4. Try to distract her with a toy when she begins to suck her thumb. But do it as subtly as possible or she will catch on.
5. You can try bribing or rewarding an older child for not sucking her thumb.
6. Corrective measures such as restraints, elbow mitts, bad-tasting substances painted on the fingers, etc. usually backfire. Pulling the child's thumb out of his mouth will only serve to make him rebel against this restraint and encourage him to continue the habit.
7. Encourage the child to give up the habit in a friendly, non-judgemental manner.

We will try to do some of these things and I hope he will then eventually stop it.

First Dental Visit

We went to PDCP (Pediatric Dentistry Center Philippines) last Saturday for Jared’s first dental check-up. When we arrived at the building, one staff immediately led us to the play room. Here, the kids can play or watch a kiddie video while waiting for their turn.

His pedia dentist is Dra. Fina Gupit-Lopez. She's good and pretty too. First, we did the knee-to-knee position. Jared was placed on my lap with his head on the dentist’s knees and his legs around my waist. She then counted Jared's teeth and checked if there are cavities or other oral health problems. At this time, Jared was crying out loud and was exerting all his effort to escape.

Next was the fluoride varnish application. Fluoride Varnish is a sticky yellowish protective coating that is painted over the teeth to prevent dental caries in children and adults. The dentist then applied a thin layer to all the teeth’s surfaces. She also told us not to give Jared any food or drink for 2 hours so that the varnish will not be washed out.

After that, they gave one free toy to Jared. He can choose from the box but since he was not in the mood, I just picked one and gave it to him. Then the dentist discussed about proper oral hygiene and other related things. She also said that Jared has healthy teeth and that she's very happy about it. We will go back after 6 months for another fluoride varnish application.

My toddler ate a kisses chocolate wrapper

Last Saturday, we were eating Hershey’s chocolate kisses. We didn’t notice that my toddler, Jared, was also eating, not the chocolate but the wrapper. His nanny caught him chewing it and he wouldn’t let us get it out of his mouth. Ryan forced him to open his mouth then I tried to get it but suddenly we heard him swallow, and then it’s gone. We checked how much did he eat and I think it’s around ¼ of the wrapper of a single Hershey’s kiss. We texted his doctor immediately but for some reason we got no reply. Maybe there’s a problem with the signal since we were in Nueva Ecija at that time. Anyway, we just decided to check his diaper for 2 consecutive days to see if he will pass it in his stool. If not, we’ll bring him to the doctor.

Luckily, just a while ago, we checked his stool and it was there. Thank God!